Calling Cupid for a Valentine's Reality Check

by Melissa Brunner

Can we seriously get real about Valentine's Day? I mean, the concept of the day is great - show the people you love how special they are to you. And, I know, girls are supposed to love all the hearts and flowers and sparkly things. But it just seems Cupid needs to shoot us with an arrow-ful of reality check.

Bam Bam is at an age where he likes me to sit with him more in the mornings, so I've been hearing a lot of relationship experts on the daytime shows. According to them, sorry, guys, but you will never meet the expectations we women have of you. We want you to give us some fairy tale experience with red roses, rare wine and exclusive dinner, with sparkly jewels as the main course. What is required of women? Your guy will love a handmade card because it's so thoughtful or maybe a new tie so he looks fantastic (cue the sweetly blinking eyelashes). Oh, and guys - if a woman says you don't need to get her anything for Valentine's Day, SHE IS LYING!

So, what I've learned is that Valentine's Day turns women into needy, demanding, shallow beings and puts guys under more intense pressure than MacGyver trying to cut the right wire.

Sorry, experts, but I'm not buying what you're selling. Truthfully, I don't think most people do - at least I hope they don't! After nearly 14 years of marriage, I don't need to be impressed, just reminded that I'm valued. I love roses, but I'm serious when I say there's no need to send them on the one day of the year when demand is peaked so the price is highest. Instead, how about on, say April 23rd, just because I worked hard the day before? Dinner? I'm cool with a good pizza or burger because  you know I like to eat real food! A gift? You know how much I love a good cup of coffee so took me to my favorite coffee shop for breakfast. Finding how to show your sweetie your love should make you smile, not sweat!

Please note the heavy dose of sarcasm in what I wrote above, but the point is that it's the little things. Much like the commercialization that surrounds Christmas, I think we need to take the same step back when it comes to Valentine's Day and realize what's important. Okay, I admit I like a big surprise as much as the next person, but it shouldn't come out of obligation or demand or some manufactured societal pressure. It should come from love. Often, the greatest of gifts come in the smallest of gestures.


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